I used to be young. Ah, it seems like only yesterday I was an ignorant adolescent, ready to take on the world like an overzealous president taking on healthcare reform (<--- lame simile and political implication).
True story: This evening, after a delightful episode of The Office, Heather and I decided we needed to visit the mothership of all markets, Wal-Mart. You SBU-ers will recall frequent excursions to the Bolivar store, often late at night when the townies occupied the corner of the parking lot across from Commerce Bank. Well, tonight's 8:30 trip with the wife went a little differently than in olden times...
"Ready to go to Wal-Mart?" I asked.
"Huh?" she replied.
"Wal-Mart. To get the groceries and stuff we need."
"Oh. [Long pause] Now?" You'll understand that "now" was my implication, because some of the needed items were for Heather's hairstyling the next morning. She acquiesced. "Well, alright."
I'll shorten the story by explaining that after watching another 10 minutes of 30 Rock, we schlepped into the bedroom so I could change shirts and she could apply a ponytail device to her hair. Knowing that our 11:00 bedtime was quickly approaching, and feeling a bit apprehensive because we never go outside after dark, we had to pump the jams on the way. That is my old-person way of saying, "We had to turn up Golddigger (the Glee version) real loud to stay awake."
Our list was nine items long. We made it in and out within 15 minutes. Total trip length: 35 minutes. Needless to say, we were exhausted.
Wow. If Wal-mart wears you out, don't have kids for a long while!
ReplyDeleteamen to that sister. I do think this is absolutely hilarious. I applaud your courage to break through the fog and routine and head out before bedtime. I also encourage you to find a way to watch Sinbad's (comedian) latest routine. Hilarious and you did not even wait to age 50 to hit some of his points. Curious?
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